11/11/2007 10:56:35

*hugs* i am so sorry, bless you all! i hope things turn out for the best for you and your entire family... feel free to holler at me anytime, i am usually around...

11/10/2007 08:01:50

OH NO!!  I am so sorry to hear that Misty!!  You and your children don't deserve that!!  I can semi-relate to it though.  I will be leaving my home sometime over the next few months to get out of a (yet again) mentally abusive relationship.  There are alot of things I need to do to prepare first but in the long run it will be best.  It will be extremely hard financially and emotionally for me (the home I live in was my grandparents) but I will do what I have to, to make a better life for my daughter and me.  I have found much comfort here on HauntSpace, not in just the the sweetest friends I have made but with the site itself.  It has allowed me an escape to get away from my troubles and be in a happy place with all things Halloween!!  I hope your health improves for you and that your husband is able to get the help he needs! Even if you do have to end up leaving in the end, maybe if he does get the help he needs, he won't do this to someone else.  Take care of yourself and stay safe.  If you ever need us, we will be here for you cause aside from scaring the poop out of the tots, Haunters are the most caring people in the world and we take care of our own!!!  Gianormous HUGS to you!!

11/10/2007 06:31:32

Wow, I am sorry to hear all that. That is terrible. I have had to deaL with violent men before and I really can't tell anyone else what to do but I will give you this...I have dealt with it in my PAST and so have some of my girlfriends. I wish you the best with him getting help. He truely has to want help and he has to admit that HE has a violence problem and needs help. He can not just say the words, he has to mean it and live it! His actions will show his true self-over the long term. Alot of men behave for now if they feel they are going to lose their family.  Your children do not deserve that and they should not be left alone with someone who can become violent and whom is suicidal. I am sure you did what you believed is right,   I am first and foremost a very protective mother, and no man or monster on this earth could make me leave my children. I would and I have left a violent man but my kids were 2 ft in front of me. I have also given a friend and her 3 kids refugee when they left a violent man and she had to seek some help to get a protection order from abuse. Her and the kids were scared for a long time and a nervous wreck, but I can tell you today she totally has her life together, without him, and is one strong cookie!  Trust me I am not trying to make you feel bad or tell you what to do, I have been there and done that! But I will leave you with this thought, when I was trying to decide if I and the kids should stay or go...this was my final conclusions....If you stay and the violence continues and emotional abuse, you and your husband are examlpes for your kids to see-you two are the role models. Boys will see that this is how you treat women or wives. Daughters see that  it is ok for men to treat women/wives this way. I, personally also came to the comclusion that I would rather be in no relationship than a BAD ONE. At the end of your letter, you said the family is getting better. I hope truely it is for all of your sakes. Also keep in mind that your children may need some counseling, and you as well if you haven't already. I hope you have family and friends that can help in a time of need. Almost all areas have a Women's Shelter that will help and have a hotline number open  24 hrs. Do not be afraid to use it if needed. Safety for you and your children! (Even if he has not been violent to the kids yet,  I am sure they see what he is doing to you. Kids are loke sponges and they don'y miss too much. And if he is hurting their Mother, he is still hurting them because those kids love you more than anyone else on earth and that bothers them) I know because I have kids who remember!!! (Our situation was only 1 1/2 yrs long but my kids and I will remember it always)